Changing Conditioners
When I was little girl, I used to wake up in the middle of the night crying from leg pain. My grandmother called it “growing pains.” It felt more like someone stabbing my legs over and over with a very sharp knife. It was excruciating.
The one thing I remember most about those nights was my uncle and grandmother taking turns rubbing my legs until I was able to sleep.
Sometimes that happened quickly and sometimes it didn’t. My uncle would play the guitar while my grandmother would rub my legs. Then they would switch. Grandma would play and my uncle would rub.
There was always the pain, the rubbing, and then finally sleep.
Walk Down Memory Lane
I haven’t thought about those nights of growing pains until a recent massage therapy session. I enjoy massages and have been getting them for over 20 years. It is what keeps my body from being one giant knot.
Over the years, I’ve had some really amazing massage therapists. In all that time, I’ve never gone to sleep or even relaxed completely. So, imagine my surprise when something happened that had never happened before. When the therapist began to rub my legs, I immediately went into a state of deep relaxation.
I thought that it was because the therapist was doing a great job. However, as soon as she moved to other parts of my body, I “woke up.” I starting paying attention. Sure enough, it happened several more times.
No matter how much time was spent on my back or shoulders, when the therapist starting working on my legs, I went “night-night.” Hmmmmm…definitely a conundrum.
Then, the memory came flooding back and it hit me. I was conditioned to go to sleep when my legs were rubbed from all those nights of “growing pains” and my family trying to help me.
Wow! For a second, I felt like one of Pavlov’s dogs.
Why hadn’t it happened before? Well, I was in a good place in my life. I was ready to hear the message. The truth is that we are all conditioned in some way. That is how behaviors are formed. When we react to a situation in the same way again and again. It becomes a behavior.
It’s also how we make or break habits, right!?! Habits are conditioning in its basic form.
For me, it made me take a step back and pause a little. I realized that subconsciously I was waiting for the “growing pains” to hit me. I tensed my body waiting and waiting for something that wasn’t coming. It took a little time but I allowed myself to relax and truly enjoy massages. And, my body was finally able to release those “knots” I had been carrying with me.
From time to time, I will take a pause and ask myself, “Where are other places in my life that I do or say things out of conditioning that isn’t benefiting me?” In other words, they are keeping me from being my best self and living my best life.
What about you?
I’m not saying to re‐evaluate your entire life. Maybe just observe yourself and your interactions today.
Are there behaviors that are keeping YOU from being your best self? Keeping you from living your best life? Behaviors that were conditioned in you from childhood.