Please Don’t Fix Me

I know you love me
I know you are trying to help
Please don’t fix me
Just let me be

Let me be in this moment right now
I know you can’t begin to understand
I really don’t expect you to understand
I just want you to accept that I am feeling what I am feeling

They are my feelings
They are not your feelings
They are not right
They are not wrong

They are just my feelings
They have no value
They have no weight
They are my feelings

Please don’t discount them
Or tell me that I shouldn’t feel this way
Or that I should feel another way
Right now, this is what I feel

Just love me
Just listen
Just love me
Knowing you love me keeps me anchored to this world

Please don’t fix me
I don’t need to be fixed
I just need to be
I want to be me

When you try to fix me
You are telling me that you don’t love me
You love the person that you are trying to make me
I want you to love me, just as I am

If you can’t handle the emotions
Then let me know
I will understand
It will be okay as long as I know that you still love me

Please don’t fix me
The more you try to convince me that what I am feeling is wrong
The more you try to tell me what I should be feeling
The more I rebel

And I rebel hard
So much so that I might walk away from you
Fast
‘Cause I already don’t like myself and I don’t need to hear it from you

Please don’t fix me
Just love me
Just listen
Not to the emotions, to me

Tell me you love
Tell me you care
Offer me a hug and some silence
But, please don’t fix me

Just love me
Just listen
The pain is almost unbearable
I want to drop down into a deep, dark hole and never come back

When you try to convince me how wrong I am
How my feelings are wrong
I am going to rebel
I am going to push back

And if you don’t listen to me
If you don’t hear me
I am going to run away
I am going to run away so fast and so far that you may never see me again

I want to leave this planet
I want to go inside myself
To hide from you and your judgment
Anywhere I can go to be free to feel my feelings

But I am terrified to let myself feel those feelings
Those deep, dark feelings
Those feelings of despair and unworthiness
I am terrified that if I go down that path, I won’t come back

I don’t know what is waiting down there for me
I don’t know if I can pull myself back
And if you are gone, if I have run away, then how will I get back
If I have no anchor, what will happen to me

I have to be strong
I have to be strong enough to pull myself back
I need to go down into the darkness
Once and for all

I need to cry
I need to cry for everything that I have lost
My innocence
My childhood

Love
Serenity
Confidence
Worthiness

I have felt this way so many times
I don’t want to feel this way again
Help me
Please

Don’t fix me
Let me be
Love me as I am
With all my feelings

Somewhere I know who I am
You know who I am
I just can’t believe it right now
So I need you to know who I am for me

But
Don’t try to convince me that is who I am
I can’t hear it right now
All I can hear is your judgment

So
Please
Please
Don’t fix me